Steve Martin

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

In amazing reversal, dog now dangling me outside window by rope. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Massive east coast snow storm makes me want to walk dog by lowering him out window on a rope. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

It's New Year's Eve! Don't forget to set your clocks back. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

RT @Rturner007: @SteveMartinToGo would like to see the "Great Flydini" go through airport security — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Only when I wear a dress. RT @CharlotteLaws: I thought you were on the "No Fly List." — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Uh oh. See three page explanation. RT @Sbei_Official: so you still smoke weed? — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Not since I was twenty. RT @Sky_Infantry: I thought you quit smoking weed. My grandad used you as an example to scold me one time. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Thanks to Twitter, flight to Colorado going well. RT @FeatsofMagic: @SteveMartinToGo abracadabra http://t.co/lM7Vb4T572 — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

RT @billy_badass: @SteveMartinToGo you mean new Amsterdam west...yeah buddy — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Evidently, this joke needs a three page article of explanation, too. RT @eunicewright1: @SteveMartinToGo Why are you telling us? — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

And you're mentioned in Geoff Dyer's new book! RT @SteepCanyon: Thanks for voting us to the top of @wncw's Top 100 List of 2013! — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Can't seem to book a flight to Colorado. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

This old New Yorker piece read pretty funny to me today. RT @Qube42: How @SteveMartinToGo joined Mensa- http://t.co/V7r6MNAzMO — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

I am NOT a member of Mensa. Can't you tell? RT @ymorat: @SteveMartinToGo I'm waiting, Mr. Mensa Man. r. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

"Twelve months hath December, April..." wait. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

This year, New Year's Eve will fall on the 31st, pushing the last few days of January into early February. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

SPOILER ALERT: Escherichia coli. MT @JoyceCarolOates: SPOILER ALERT title of film "All is Lost." — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Christmas is tomorrow, idiot. Wait...hang on...RT @notremors: Get a life dude. Can't believe you're on Twitter on Christmas morning. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

I was hacked. RT @Firegal_01: @SteveMartinToGo Finally! A non-apology tweet! — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Wow! Thank you! MT @allmusic: One of the finest folk albums of the year was by @EdieBrickell & @SteveMartinToGo. http://t.co/e06KA0SqQH — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

I may one day wear a funny hat. RT @LBlissett: @SteveMartinToGo Do you think you will ever be funny again? — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

That is EXACTLY what I'm suggesting.RT @EricCraigWing: Wait, are you suggesting that comedy isn’t an exact science like pro wrestling? — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

RT @stokith: @SteveMartinToGo @splinter48708 @1938loren It is an EX-horse! — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

RT @splinter48708: @SteveMartinToGo @1938loren Steve...That horse is well and truly deceased. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

I intend to beat it to death. RT @1938loren: stop with the apologizing already. It's hard to watch. — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

.@lovebscott You can read my full explanation here: http://t.co/ie0pWLZD2f — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Yes, Joyce. Full explanation of my misdeeds: http://t.co/CJWlCPqpve MT @JoyceCarolOates: Steve's wry wit distorted & misunderstood? What? — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

All jokes will now be accompanied by three page article. RT @Orlando_1204: Can you provide a similar explanation for all your jokes? — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Thanks, Bill. Uh, you are THE William S. right? RT @WilliamShatner: You are a man of integrity and honor. Oh your jokes are funny, too! ;-) — PolitiTweet.org

Steve Martin @SteveMartinToGo

Here's a better link. Easier to read against the background. http://t.co/CJWlCPqpve — PolitiTweet.org