Deleted tweet detection is currently running at reduced
capacity due to changes to the Twitter API. Some tweets that have been
deleted by the tweet author may not be labeled as deleted in the PolitiTweet
interface.
Showing page 53 of 75.
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@mileskahn and I have prepared a tour de force for you tonight on TDS. Veterans! Also @aasif @jonesinforjason @almadrigal @msjwilly! — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Moving day. I'm going to need a quart of human growth hormone and a tiger milk smoothie. Stat. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@SteadmanDrew on a case by case basis — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@SteadmanDrew I'm open to it. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Does anyone have scissors? Sporting an impressive white-pants-coffee stain and I'm thinking of making them into shorty short jean shorts. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Is anyone in need of a giant pimple to light their way in the darkness? I have one of those. (Also available for parties) — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
At what point do I become a sleep-shouter? Is it soon? — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@SarahThyre I will be wearing Ziplock bags on my feet tomorrow, so that's a pretty good start — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
What's fun about moving is when you pack all your shoes and then you don't have any shoes to wear while you're moving. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Tonight's challenge: bake myself into a giant croissant and fight my way out using only my mouth. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
My favorite part of this LA trip is how my father keeps unironically calling it Albert Kinney Blvd. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Thinking of renaming my family "The New York Complainiacs" — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @heiditron3000: "What is life? What is the universe? Are there a myriad copies of me in other dimensions?" she pondered. Then her dog bu… — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Me to my children just now: "how about if we DON'T go anywhere, and just try staring into space for awhile?" — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Sometimes I catch my own reflection and think "I would have made a terrific Pilgrim." — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@RealGabbyHayes @thebosha All the Canadians. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@theleanover @TheBosha I enjoy learning about real-world solutions to real-world problems. Like for when your eyeball falls out. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@TheBosha Let's hold hands. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@benrossen AND the greatest thing I've ever seen. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
He's now a paper cup unicorn. That's much better. http://t.co/k1wkza8Qzm — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@GagaFanMel My mother-in-law just filled me in *shivers* — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
I can't believe I've never watched this show before. Untold Stories Of The E.R. Feast your eye. http://t.co/MiOvzikFiK — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
What's good for chasing demons out of the human body? Acupuncture? Kale salad? — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @ElBloombito: Cuidado! Mother Natura estan smokingo el cracko y thinkos esta wiñtero agaiño. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Somebody just told me 'palazzo pants' are coming back. Dear Sweet Baby Jesus, why have you forsaken us? — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@biggayicecream Please start calling me Peppermint Gomez. Pretty please. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
I'm molting. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Birds can be such assholes. http://t.co/iaZf6jl6V3 — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@aimeemann I really and truly adore your work. CAN NOT WAIT to see you on TDS tonight. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Parenting 3 children is like this: my son just peed in a tiny Calico Critters toilet AND I COULD NOT CARE LESS. — PolitiTweet.org