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Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@biggayicecream "Samantha Bee's Croissundae." Please put your heads together and get back to me as soon as possible. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
I think I just invented something and it's called "The Croissundae" and you're welcome France. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Yes that's right I said casserole. DEAL WITH IT. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
In my kitchen making a casserole at 10 o'clock on a Friday night. Maybe some cicadas could fly into my hair and turn this into a party. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @azimm: @iamsambee hits the nail on the head: On Hitting The Reset Button http://t.co/2qNrwvYeLm — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Today we are all unpricked sausages on a hot charcoal grill. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Nothing attracts children to the kitchen more reliably than the sound of a glass shattering into a million pieces on the floor. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @GQMagazine: The 6 Funniest Comedy Couples: http://t.co/hE5Whqb3xx @prattprattpratt @iamsambee @JuddApatow — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @ariscott: Special K diet: 1. Bowl of cereal for breakfast 2. Bowl of cereal for lunch 3. Sensible dinner 4. Murder everyone — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Twitter told me to follow Alyssa Milano and Margaret Atwood AT THE SAME TIME. Resting comfortably now. #Traumatized. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
“@MrButterChicken: Just cover yourself with cereal so that they will inadvertently pay attention to you when they are hungry.” On it. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
What happens when *I* have a bad stomach ache? My kids gather around and nurse me back to health? HahahahohoHAHAHAHAhaha(infinity) — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@TIMEANDDESIRE thank you! I needed that... — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @ThatKatieTucker: So I guess New York City can technically be considered a rainforest now? — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@theleanover @AllanaHarkin I think I can hold on. No promises. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
When stranded at the airport, how long do I have to wait before it is socially acceptable for me to cannibalize @AllanaHarkin? — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Stranded at the airport. Send a makeup artist STAT. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@wilnervision @jonesinforjason sometimes I worry about that. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
If anyone would care to ask, yes, I would be happy to fix the entire airline industry. All you had to do was ask. #attheairportsince11am — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @zhubinparang: If you were told to recite all of "1984" in one minute over a revving Harley you would sound like how Michelle Malkin tal… — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
“@LiddabitSweets: This is a new thing Jen is working on. Deal with it. http://t.co/G2nSv12aqQ” AAgh! What IS that?! I need it!! — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
I wish the rims of my sunglasses were made of Wagon Wheel cookies. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@wilnervision @mightygodking @clodia_risa @TheDailyShow Yes, me too please. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @TheDailyShow: .@iamsambee and @jonesinforjason identify Canada's two national crack-related industries. http://t.co/4iwfOHRULu http://t… — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
My regular/business emails are starting to look like a serial killer manifesto in a movie. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
In case you didn't know this, @realmickfoley is one of the best humans Mother Nature ever birthed out. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
“@realmickfoley: Sure would be nice if @iamsambee came to my show @CarolinesonBway on June 2nd.” Can you do another one on June 4th? Pls! — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Going to see @tomhanks tonight in @LuckyGuyPlay with @AllanaHarkin! In other words: EXCITEY-PANTS — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
“@Friedmanzone: @iamsambee The correct term should be "a persistent charm discharge".” @wilnervision this could work too! — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@wilnervision Well, of course there are exceptions to every rule. — PolitiTweet.org
