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Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@JulietteMoak @TheDailyShow Yes. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
“@TheDailyShow: #TDSBreakingNews Flying spiders migrate through Texas..." @iamsambee re-reads this and never stops scratching again — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Current state of panties: in a twist. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@ChrisRRegan @jasonjross @TheTweetOfGod Doj. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Ted Cruz sounds so much better if you say it with a short "u" — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@jasonjross Is this yours? I think I might have stolen it. http://t.co/UKlotxsFPX — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Obstructionists please launch yourselves into orbit and untether from the ship. Your presence here is no longer required. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
The best way to communicate your displeasure with someone is by offering them a lemon-poppyseed muffin. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
The beach is a great place for me to relax and continuously scan the water for dorsal fins. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@alisondeyette thank you so much! Yaaarrrrrr! — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
The worst thing about an airport bathroom is that lone housefly who keeps trying to land on your face. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
“@TheDailyShow: .@iamjohnoliver, @iamsambee @jonesinforjason, @aasif guess the heights of buildings they see http://t.co/1FOqzZJLln” — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Secret's out! #MissAmerica http://t.co/aKVH3hjbKI — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @TheDailyShow: .@iamsambee, @mrbobodenkirk, and David Cross apologize to the citizens of Egypt. http://t.co/zlkJatWYDu http://t.co/ylls5… — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@Mark_Forward Fashion magazines: "we will say this thing is pretty so many times that you will start to believe it" — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@JRHavlan I can make all kinds of dreams come true! — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
My three year old (sobbing): "I wish *we* could have dog poo inside our house!" — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
European sizes are mean. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
The Parent Trap #mysexlifeinmovietitles — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @TheAdvocateMag: WATCH: 'The Daily Show' Grills Russian Diplomat On 'Gay Centaur' Vladimir Putin http://t.co/zbRTfubHuP — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
This one's strictly for the ladies. http://t.co/CKwrb0hX70 — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Spending most of the day brushing up on the important stuff. http://t.co/fJzaUC53eh — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@finslippy I second that — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@NekoCase pencil skirt — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Spending the weekend getting my body in shape for turtleneck season. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Every recipe with eggplant is just making the best of a bad situation. *drops mic* *kitchen explodes in the background* — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
This cookie looks as delicious as its name would suggest. http://t.co/GKnCg11Vfj — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
Everyone in Congress just enjoyed a collective pants-piddle. — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
RT @AllanaHarkin: Look! A Canadian Flag! w/ @iamsambee http://t.co/9nCU7ecWTs — PolitiTweet.org
Samantha Bee @iamsambee
@BrentButt Thank you. That is one of the finest compliments I have ever received. #iamapenmanshipnerd — PolitiTweet.org
