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daniel tosh @danieltosh
my home burnt down, but the patriots lost. so, not the worst weekend. — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
politics aside, can we all agree no one in florida deserves to vote? just send us your grapefruits! — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
now that the country is firing on all cylinders, let’s fix the planet! #toshsavestheworld charity show is in vegas… https://t.co/Se0mTz2Vte — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
do you want to feel like an unexciting, lazy, non-traveling pussy? check out my new cliff diving friend on tonight’… https://t.co/Eo5vwsjCia — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
dvr alert for tonight's #tosh!! it pairs nicely with either a blue wave or xenophobia. — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
did my civic duty in every district today. in california, they let us snowflakes vote as many times as we want!! https://t.co/FzhBKqf0i7 — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
as a dolphins fan, i’ll stop wasting energy hating nick saban a day after drew brees goes into the hall of fame. #votetuesday — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
so before another garbage two-loss team gets to leapfrog your still undefeated defending national champs #ucf, let’… https://t.co/0fObBk26Gv — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
finally, everyone can win in vegas!! come see me headline with super guest comedians! all for charity! or i will co… https://t.co/WjrFEBs9m0 — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
halloween’s tomorrow but there’s no reason not to do a practice run of your candy route after tonight’s all new spooky #tosh! — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
got in a big fight with my ballerina wife this weekend about “a star is born.” was he jerking it in that garage sce… https://t.co/1IlnTvDrOL — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
in the past i’ve been a champion for women, lgbtq’s, and poc’s. on tonight’s new #tosh, you can add deafs to the li… https://t.co/1OZTRqph2a — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
congrats to former #ucf head coach scott frost and everyone up at nebraska on their first win!!! — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
"the tosh point show in the snow" will be in beautiful lake tahoe. tickets on sale now! #thoughtsandprayersforsnow https://t.co/ghIxXNwXxD — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
do the lord’s work and buy a ticket to my early show in vegas, all for charity!!! with some not so family-friendly… https://t.co/CIaTVhkNv9 — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
consider this your invitation to watch tonight's all new #tosh now!!! — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
there’s a new #tosh on tonight, in case you needed something to do during the red sox’s dozens of pitching changes. — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
why wait for me to solve all your #localtwissues on tonight’s new #tosh when you can watch the director’s cut now?! https://t.co/Sp3aGuy4SD — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
any issues that need fixing in your town? complain about them and i’ll give your local problem the national platfor… https://t.co/jeRSTnpc7g — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
in all my years on this flat earth, i’ve never met a genius so fearless, driven, and horny. #tosh https://t.co/iQHwukNtKv — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
spend as much time as you can stomach going down this rabbit hole of cringe. just don’t spend any money! new #tosh… https://t.co/hLpYCu0LNK — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
please don’t watch tonight’s new #tosh. i’d like to keep this one to myself. “#hashtag1 in all of hollywood!!” — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
i’m encouraging all my fans to unregister to vote. you are dumb as shit and do not deserve a say in this country. — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
new #tosh tonight! you have several minutes to make yourself presentable. — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
my performance art auction, which features tons of nudity, will blow banksy’s little shredding stunt out of the wat… https://t.co/BJ7EErC2hT — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
this will finally put "big trampoline" out of business! #doublebc #tosh https://t.co/q3uIMjVtWz — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
no matter what you idiots think “boof” means, tonight is a new #tosh!!! — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
if you’ve ever played football or were in a frat, you are only qualified to work at enterprise. — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
the list of hypotheticals was too long for one sode! here’s the complete list for “would i cheat on my wife with…”… https://t.co/XSJQ45D85N — PolitiTweet.org
daniel tosh @danieltosh
the people have spoken! unfortunately i wasn’t really paying attention to what they said. new #tosh starts now!! — PolitiTweet.org