God (Not a Parody, Actually God)

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

I hate what you've done with the place. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Shit's fucked up, is what I'm sayin'. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Sigh... maybe Nietzsche was right. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

I work in mysterious ways. If at all. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Never forget that your Heavenly Father loves you and is watching over you and is extremely disappointed in what you've done with your life. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Inner peace requires outer up-shutting. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

I did not create the entire universe in six days for you to go around twerking. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Most popular music should not be. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Knock it off, Kanye. Real gods don't autotune. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

You'll have much better odds looking for the meaninglessness of life. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

If I gave you the ability to easily and pleasurably masturbate and simultaneously declared masturbation a sin, I am a cosmic asshole. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

I expect to hear all of you moaning My name tonight. In groups of two. Minimum. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

In a court of law you're innocent until proven guilty. In reality you're innocent until you commit a crime. Note the difference. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Changing religions is like switching cigarette brands. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Let he who hath no sin among thee cast the next Batman. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

People who don't get sarcasm are very, very, very, very smart. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

You know who's very upset about Ben Affleck being cast as Batman? Syrian children killed by chemical weapons. #TalkAboutFirstWorldProblems — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

You atheists bitch and moan that I'm a fictional character, but cast Ben Affleck as Batman and it's "Sacrilege!" this and "Blasphemy!" that. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

If I could re-edit the Bible I wouldn't delete all the gay orgies. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

"YOL∞". - Hindu cliché. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

The problem with a lot of people these days is they're stupid. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

I won't be satisfied until I have enough followers to form sects that fight about how to interpret My tweets until they kill each other. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

How do I feel about millions of people killing each other in My name? How do you think I feel? Very, very flattered. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

"Aren't I allowed to have an opinion?" is what people say when they have a stupid opinion. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

You're so vain. I bet you think this universe is about you. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. But a tooth is worth half an eye, so an eye for two teeth also works, if you're out of eyes. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

There is no area on earth to which I have devoted more time and attention than the Middle East and just look at the fucking place. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

America is the greatest country on earth at thinking it's the greatest country on earth. — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Just updated My Facebook status from "Single" to "In a Trinity". #wayoverdue — PolitiTweet.org

God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod

Quite a mess you've gotten yourself into down there. Good luck with that. — PolitiTweet.org