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God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Death to the unbelievers. Also, death to the believers. 'Cause you're all gonna die, folks. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
And now the controversial "stop and frisk" policy, as debated by a bird, a lesbian cheetah, @PFTompkins and a weasel. http://t.co/nR7v7DW1r4 — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Meanwhile, in an alternate universe, America remembers the 50th anniversary of JFK's suicide. http://t.co/KXf4GovWbk — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
And now, a debate on gay marriage between a goat, a vulture, @PFTompkins, and a cavewoman. http://t.co/xySGPauBCC — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
It's good to learn from your mistakes but it's better not to have made them to begin with, loser. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Meanwhile, in an alternate universe, Screaming Rhubarb Lady is running for President! http://t.co/za9R4VETJW — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Now on My side project "No You Shut Up!", @PFTompkins sits down with a war correspondent who is also a vulture. http://t.co/hSc8VmfIbF — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Even if you don't believe in Me anymore, I hope we can still be imaginary friends. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
I am looking forward to 6pm Thanksgiving Day when Walmart opens its doors for its annual sale of trampled human corpses. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Ladies and gentlemen, the alternate universe Gettysburg Address. Please share this great speech with your friends. http://t.co/afD2GgBmZ8 — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
I know it seems like things don't make sense sometimes, but the truth is they don't make sense ever. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
And now, @PFTompkins discusses immigration with an alien. An actual alien. #NoYouShutUp http://t.co/F1bxK1TKxP — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
I listen to your prayers, but only to correct their grammar. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
And now, @TheTweetOfGod + @PFTompkins + Henson Studios = "No, You Shut Up". Puppets debate the issues. It's awesome. http://t.co/ugBxMROKPE — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
When the selling point of your beer is that it's cold, you make bad beer. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
The Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt buy My book. http://t.co/Bra1SXI1wn http://t.co/N2mZLTfYKV — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
You don't think, therefore I am. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
If you want to know what an authentic religious and mythological experience feels like, you should be in San Francisco today. #batkid — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
I know I kid around a lot, but seriously, you're going to hell. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
According to a recent study, you suck. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Meanwhile, in an alternate universe, @Fred_Willard shares his memories of the Bay of Pigs. http://t.co/YuGtkM3o5B — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
The difference between the Catholic Church and Las Vegas is in Vegas the architecture is more tasteful and the illegal sex is consensual. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
In 100 million years when your fossilized bodies are burned as fuel by humanity's successors I'm going to laugh and laugh and laugh. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
My followers are the best! Anyone who doesn't follow Me can go to hell. And will. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Gravity is a real downer. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Meanwhile, in another universe, kids are lining up for the hot new war! http://t.co/L8CFKM6fGE — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Death has a wonderful way of clearing your schedule. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
You're all too busy waiting for Me to destroy you to realize that you're destroying you. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
In the grand scheme of things your life is of absolutely no consequence. I cannot stress this enough. — PolitiTweet.org
God (Not a Parody, Actually God) @TheTweetOfGod
Here's the thing: If I don't exist then it's all your fault. — PolitiTweet.org
