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Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
I’m not trying to be weird but when my cat dies you are all going to have to be there for me — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Don’t like the fact that all the animals I like are going to die before all of the humans I like when I like the humans less — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
@Firstladyoflove @drdrew Omg — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Just imagining a haunted house full of Capitals and Reds fans — PolitiTweet.org
National Review @NRO
Liberal Author: ‘Normal’ People Must Stop Wearing Any Kind of Red Hat Because Red Hats Are Scary… https://t.co/6CcsRNxtjO
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
@drdrew If you could make this meet up happen I would be officially convinced you are a genie instead of just moderately convinced as I am now — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
When?? Please come hang out w @Firstladyoflove and I and we can put bees on our head but God help anyone who dares to call us a bee head. — PolitiTweet.org
Andy Milonakis @andymilonakis
@KatTimpf @Firstladyoflove I’m actually moving back to NY for the first time in 15 years
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
@Firstladyoflove @andymilonakis Would do anything to hang out w u and @andymilonakis — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
HOLY SHIT DID NOT SEE THE TWIST OF HIM WEARING TIGHTS COMING OMG LMAO https://t.co/i72LCbnm1Z — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Now we wait https://t.co/Qc4r0En36n — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
LMAO IT IS GETTING WEIRD YALL https://t.co/d3kV47A4cN — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Literally why do I not have this luck when I’m playing scratch offs — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Literally texted a random number saying happy belated birthday Shane and that a cake was on the way bc “I care” and somehow it turns out that his name is actually Shane lmaooooooo https://t.co/EnymcqjaMc — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
@Firstladyoflove Miss you already steal Drew’s Amex and book a flight to New York and blame it on Andy Milonakis — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Miss you already steal Drew’s Amex and book yourself a flight to NYC and blame it on OJ Simpson — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
@Firstladyoflove I love youuuu — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
I can tell from the area code that he’s from Seattle area. Took a stab at the name. Let’s see what happens. https://t.co/5zhYWIcYB7 — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Anyone who says you can’t have fun alone is lying https://t.co/qlUnq7rwgC — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
@TheGunzShow It’s so fun — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Lmaooo this is fun everyone do it https://t.co/vZpJQkuvQD — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
This is the most fun https://t.co/4SFEwRXCcd — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
https://t.co/hDYOFYkWjY — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Very proud to know that I have no idea what an “Antonio Brown” is. I hope everyone sees this tweet and interprets it as me being a prolific reader. (Of books.) — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
So bored at this party that I think I’m going to just start texting “Happy belated birthday!!!” to random numbers and see if anyone bites I think of it as fishing without the worms and outdoor elements — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
*Kat arrives home* Kat: You’re not ready to go? You haven’t showered??? @CameronFriscia: Did you mean “Thank you for cleaning the apartment and the litter box and doing your laundry and having lunch ready on the table?” Kat: YOU DIDN’T EVEN SAY ANYTHING ABOUT MY HAIR — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
And anyway to answer your questions yes everyone is absolutely drinking White Claw and yes of course tennis is on a big TV in the main room — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
I write sketches too but again that is just saying stuff but in a roundabout way — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
Yes I write too but that is just saying stuff in a way that involves typing — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
At a house party with a bunch of Business People and they’re like what do you do for a living and I’m like oh I say stuff that’s it that’s the job — PolitiTweet.org
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
I agree! — PolitiTweet.org
Ken E. Hall @kenkenhall
@KatTimpf What just happened to Army was the real crime
Kat Timpf @KatTimpf
I don’t understand how people have the time to keep up with football she says to herself as she starts her 8383973828384th true crime documentary — PolitiTweet.org
