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Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
make the kids do it and pay them in candy — PolitiTweet.org
Adam Sales @fatharpdavis
@ebruenig like--what do people do? spend hours picking them all out of the grass? just leave them there? pick up most and hope for the best?
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
RT @USProgressives: BREAKING: A bipartisan group of nearly 50 members of Congress just introduced legislation to invoke constitutional war… — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
me: please, guys. think of your little sib--- [i am torn apart by water balloon fire like willem dafoe in platoon] — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
trying to figure out how to set up a demilitarized zone to protect infant and toddler siblings from the total war sure to unfold on the kindergartener water balloon battlefield that will be my back yard this weekend when my older kid turns 6 — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@posters_union @Willie75189 remind u of anyone — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@ASFleischman greasing my child to protect her from the 5g waves — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
somebody photoshop a camel in her free hand and she's a dead ringer for my dearly departed paternal grandma — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
i would like to place an order for a big pizza with cheese shaped like a heart https://t.co/ueZIjWUQ2D — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@Tw02991271 yeah, i'll have to make it up — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
RT @pmtaylor410: @ebruenig @mcoz16 Keeping up with the sopranos playlist crossover, here's Tony Soprano crying to Grouper (albeit a differe… — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
RT @nicholastristan: @ebruenig Night Shift absolutely blew my mind off when I first heard it, everything about it just fits so beautifully… — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@mcoz16 this tweet was instantly fatal to me — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
RT @mcoz16: @ebruenig I put on messy star, close my eyes and picture this https://t.co/dzCe7mT46f — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@AirspaceIowa bluey — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@pierredontcare1 sometime he sleepy — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
if you don't monitor children's activities they can get into all kinds of trouble, including racketeering and institutional corruption — PolitiTweet.org
Healthcare, please @AndrewB60053540
@ebruenig Why do you get up so early with them?
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@wkswediik klldskfdsl i honestly didn't miss a beat, i was like, yeah! like if santa were in ratatouille! it would own! — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@AnfieldGrowed too bad i already assumed it's cool new slang now i'm using it — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
assembling this year's Sad All Summer playlist https://t.co/7srnVOUlvu — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@ebruenigwhiners haha i love it — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
my great grandma legit held that Jesus Christ was a Baptist and you couldn't argue with her. she couldn't read and therefore you couldn't proof text it. insanely powerful — PolitiTweet.org
Gershom @astrangerthere
@ebruenig I mean… it is. Abraham it the ur-southerner
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
when i was a kid my mom told me being hospitable to guests, like serving them better food than you'd make for yourself and serving them before you/your family, is literally In The Bible — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
i'm from the south. take this down before my mom sees it and beats my ass because yours isnt available — PolitiTweet.org
The Independent @Independent
🔴 VOICES | I’m Swedish – it’s true that we don’t serve food to guests. What’s the problem? https://t.co/dM4VITAp6J https://t.co/U2QqzXtmHa
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@PeteGGriffin bluey — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
me: but i'm tired my kids [spiritually]: who asked — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
millennials arent having kids bc they make you get out of bed at like 430a. this is not snowflake to me. this is not participation trophy. https://t.co/c5NXKfFelL — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
reflecting this early morning on the time i had a dream that i saw a pterodactyl flying around outside and i was freaking out being like "matt we have to do something!!" and in my dream @MattBruenig was like "what are you gonna do, call the cops on it? let it live" and just vibed — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@lisafleisher yeah. this is frankly humanitarian — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
@ByYourLogic felix has been compromised to a permanent end — PolitiTweet.org
Elizabeth Bruenig @ebruenig
RT @ByYourLogic: I’m starting based horoscopes for shitposters! — PolitiTweet.org
