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Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I can’t go see the new Downtown Abbey movie because I’ll tear a hole in the white person continuum. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Am I crazy or have the trees been talking A LOT louder recently? — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
To save water, I’m cutting my showers in half to one a month. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Was thrilled to surprise my live audience at @Wiltern with one of the funniest and most talented people I know, Bill Hader. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/ks6jc4NEuD — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
My fan Lindsay gets people "naked and salty" in float tanks for a living. Hear all about it @ https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/tDCoGYWvMI — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I threw a potato at Elle Fanning in a past life and she came on my podcast for revenge. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/EZEnKtAzGu — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
And on Saturday the 14th, Jason rested. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Just had to tell my kids their inheritance is all Mr. Bean NFT’s. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Proof that there’s a just God: the Winklevoss twins are now only single-digit billionaires. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
They just found some of my old monologues at the bottom of Lake Mead. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The takeaway from this fan interview: power tools are dangerous and chickens are assholes. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/E6W4vCDQ3z — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Was delighted to chat with @PFTompkins about his first time on my late night show, his John Wilkes Booth-inspired attire, and why it’s never too late to have a sex party. https://t.co/pfOk23nSHZ https://t.co/NwCDjQZXgT — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
All my wife wants for Mother’s Day is two years of alone time. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
It's been an honor celebrating #CollegeSigningDay with @MichelleObama over the years. Wishing the best of luck to the class of 2022. @BetterMakeRoom @ReachHigher https://t.co/tw2VhqA3q2 — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I’m glad he went to medical school, because “Mr. Strange” lacks oomph. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Mother’s Day is Sunday, so only 4 days left until my last minute trip to Rite Aid. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Thinking of dying my hair neon pink after meeting my fan Melissa. Thoughts? https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/l1lqkM5Zwa — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I adore John @Mulaney but this conversation went off the rails quickly. Our apologies to The Muppets, Wheel of Fortune, and Julian Lennon. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/WYuSMOlYpE — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I love Money Heist but damnit, when will someone make Monkey Heist? — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Once again, I’ve waited to the last second to buy a Maypole. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
My family has politely declined to be part of the Conan multiverse. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I’d like to remind NFL teams that I’m in decent shape and just cured my plantar fasciitis. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Just used a Theragun on my leg and it turned my hamstring into waffle batter. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Hear me listen in horror as a fan describes the process of "dog locking." https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/0PXvlXhYIs — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Hear about the various crimes a tutu-clad Molly Shannon committed as a child @ https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/TubgKHFthE — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I’ve only been at #Coachella for a day and twice the crowd has tried to load me into a waiting ambulance. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Took my daughter to #Coachella and saw @phoebe_bridgers absolutely kill it last night. She's so talented, I'm rethinking my plan to become an indie rock star. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Took my daughter to #Coachella and saw @phoebe_bridgers absolutely kill it last night. She's so talented, I'm rethinking my plan to become a indie rock star. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
My interest rates have never been lower. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I’m not on Cameo, but for a small fee I will tweet your anti-government tirade. — PolitiTweet.org
