Conan O'Brien

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Thanks to @ChinatownMarket for creating this cool Team Coco merch collection and capturing the sadness in my eyes. https://t.co/aQLyEuWrgL #ConanCon — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Kicked off my week at Comic-Con with some help from @state_design. https://t.co/3PvCkmOJdE #ConanCon #SDCC — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

For this year's Comic-Con, I'm going dressed as Gary Wick, John Wick's older brother who had a successful career in advertising before buying a B&B in wine country. #ConanCon — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Once a week, my Dad calls me and asks when I’m having my gender reveal party and then laughs and hangs up. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Dear middle-aged white men running for president: you've heard of sports cars, right? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

My friend @kumailn stopped by the podcast to set the record straight about his last-minute cancellation on my tv show. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/76W7KgiM2p — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Somewhere the earthquake publicist is like "I'm sorry, they're into hurricanes now." — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Ever since Eric Swalwell dropped out of the presidential race, my life has had no meaning. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

We had to scramble when @kumailn couldn't make it last night, but I think we turned a tricky situation into something really fun. https://t.co/rYg4qLBs5e — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Sometimes I still can't believe it took me 6 months to realize my first girlfriend was made of Lego. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

The letter O is just the number 0 after a cruise buffet — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I'm guessing there will soon be entire generations that assume apples the fruit were named after Apples the computers. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

My friend @AndyRichter stopped by to plug his new podcast and tell a filthy story about Carol Channing. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/gMpUEW4VDt — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

When Meryl Streep wins an Emmy for “Big Little Lies”, do think she’ll toss it out her car window on the way home? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

They are re-releasing Avengers: Endgame with extra footage of Disney executives swimming in money. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

The real American holiday is July 5th when you can buy a flag at Walmart for 50% off. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Just found out that every Fourth of July, the British celebrate, "We Dodged a Bullet Day." — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

It’s easy to think that Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin is a coward for delaying the release of the Harriet Tubman $20 bill. See how easy it is? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Is Marianne Williamson a meditation app? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Mila Kunis is a very special person who did some very funny and illegal stuff when she was a teenager. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/hjyZwn7ngx — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Not far off: Joe Biden in a Kangol hat. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Remember: you can be anything you set your mind to being. For instance, I always dreamed of being a guy who fired off empty cliches. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

My spank bank recently closed and is now an Orange Julius. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Just assembled an Ikea bed frame without even once looking at the directions! https://t.co/mkToke8JZc — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Whoever smelt it extracted a purer form of metal from its ore through a process involving heating and melting. Whether or not they dealt it depends on the market. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I’m headed out now to the record store to buy #TheRaconteurs’ new album. Then I’m going to the pharmacy for a chocolate malt. I live in a small town in 1948. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Whenever a man I've never heard of is trending on Twitter, I get excited because I'm about to discover another soccer star. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Thank you to @thesamrichardson and his family for their incredible hospitality. I can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard or ate so much. #ConanGhana https://t.co/XFTEjUIuw7 — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Worked the string dance into a music video with Ghanaian superstar @kuamieugene. My life is complete. #ConanGhana https://t.co/DApunMDfkC — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

.@billyeichner plans to use his "Lion King money" to destroy everyone who ever got in his way, and I respect that. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/vHoAyHQf1y — PolitiTweet.org