Conan O'Brien

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Paul Rudd stopped by the show with a clip from his new Netflix series, "Living With Yourself." https://t.co/mCN6uj3uV3 — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Today I had an “Improbable Impossible Burger,” which tastes just like an Impossible Burger, but it’s 100% beef. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

According to my new friend @iamjohnoliver, food should be wasted for comedic purposes, doctors are not necessary, and most British comedy is very bad. https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/W0RQgFXYeW — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

If only my parents had given me a memorable first name. https://t.co/LX7FWRk9nr https://t.co/t2LDseg0N6 — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Jenga but with Toblerone bars. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

When Tom Steyer drops out of the race, it’ll mean we still won't have a billionaire president. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I just heard a box of adult diapers whisper “See you real soon.” — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

It's smart of Trudeau to hold the election before Halloween, I mean why even tempt yourself? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

“Start again. Still not getting it.” - Time traveling Thomas Jefferson, after I tried to explain Twitter to him. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

If you do a Google image search for “owls with eating disorders” this is the first result: https://t.co/QMbxcGBGdE — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

If you look up the definition of "definition," you do not get my abs. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I want to thank the incomparable Tina Fey for doing my podcast, and for calling me "the Judi Dench of TV." https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/4zQT88omQg — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Movie pitch: Millenials buy a house that turns out to be haunted, but they're just grateful they were able to afford something in a good school district. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

The only 3-way I was ever a part of was getting the middle seat on a Southwest Airlines flight. Miss you, Ed, Tyrell. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I don’t mean to be a conspiracy theorist but the Nobel Prize for chemistry always seems to go to a scientist. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Support #NEXTForAutism by entering to get drawn into a future episode of @RickandMorty! You and your friend could meet creators @JustinRoiland and Dan Harmon, tour the production offices in LA, and win a merch bundle (Pickle Rick included!). https://t.co/hnDqYSPWmE — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

True love is going through all 30 pages of my wedding album and using a Sharpie to blacken my orange Crocs. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Whether you call them "hotcakes," "pancakes," or "flapjacks," you're calling shoes the wrong thing. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Ironically a great way to fall asleep and have dreams is to have someone tell you about theirs. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

RT @TeamCoco: A message from Conan and his dog Clickbait. https://t.co/RoHnQLaKpc https://t.co/nqOj2E7rqa — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

David Letterman is the reason I get to do whatever the hell it is I do for a living. Hear our conversation @ https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/OARpxJMBl0 — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I have a very specific kind of OCD where I like to buy a dozen donuts and a dozen donut holes and then reunite them. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Do you think Putin is mad at Trump for cheating on him with another country? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

One upside to all the squabbling over the Impeachment hearings: this Thanksgiving is a great time to tell your family you’re gay. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

If the whistle blower testifies to Congress, I hope he wears a referee’s uniform. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I auditioned to be the Old Spice guy and one thing led to another, anyway I'm now the new face of Old Bay seasoning. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Pro tip: you don't actually have to do the diet to talk about it incessantly. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Siri how do I give myself muscles in Photoshop wait don't post to Twitter stop undo undo — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Thanks for the cocaine, @NicholasBraun. https://t.co/Iea36Y5vEk #SuccessionHBO — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

“Snap! Crackle! Pop!” – me getting out of a beach chair. — PolitiTweet.org