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Showing page 32 of 180.
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
What a joy swapping Prince stories, celebrity crushes, and SNL memories with the crazy-talented @MayaRudolph (aka @KamalaHarris). Hear our conversation @ https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/EHqPZ2J2LP — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
We’ve been in lockdown so long I’ve had time to re-learn Spanish and re-forget Spanish. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Face masks should have a reflective surface, so people who aren’t wearing them can see what assholes they are. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Now that everyone has more free time on their hands, any chance we can finally get around to changing the name of sour cream? — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I just heard that most of the babies recently born in New Zealand take a moment to look around then loudly say, "Ohhh, HELL YEAH!" — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Today is the Wednesday you thought was Thursday. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Money-saving idea: get rid of Mike Pence, replace with a large vanilla milkshake. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I spoke with my friend @JimCarrey about comedy, truth, and his new genre-defying memoir @ https://t.co/pfOk236hQr https://t.co/0uqm3PXFc4 — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I’m excited to announce the launch of Twatch, my new live streaming service where you can watch me assemble jigsaw puzzles. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Question for the man with the medically grafted penis growing out of his arm: Are you getting more--or fewer--rides when you hitchhike? — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Today Dr. Fauci announced he’s hopeful by year’s end we’ll have a release date for TENET. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
People are calling for the presidential debates to be canceled, but if that happens, how will I decide who to vote for? — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I let a jellyfish sting me today, just for the physical contact. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I am still available if Joe Biden changes his mind and decides to go with a white woman. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
If Trump bans TikTok, what will I threaten to join when my kids don’t do their homework? — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I’ve got a new side hustle, and it’s getting the hilarious @wkamaubell to be my friend. Check out my season opener and hear why he is definitely not interested. https://t.co/pfOk23nSHZ https://t.co/VF101nFdCc — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I can only imagine how slow Netflix streaming must have been while quarantining for the 1918 pandemic. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
When I cook, I only use the freshest herbs and vegetables to f*** up the recipe. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Well, looks like the wife and I are gearing up for another Date Month. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Have we settled on a term for all our new mask-related acne yet? Maskne? Macne? Covimples? — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Ladies, I’m a 2-ply, washable cloth mask in the streets and a surgical n95 respirator in the sheets. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I'm starting to resent the way my Postmate always says, "Another 3-pizza Tuesday, Mr. O'Brien?” — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Idea: we hire Jeff Goldblum to calmly talk this virus into chilling out. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
True Crime Podcast Idea: 'The Husband Didn't Do It'. It will be 2 episodes. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Our father, who art in heaven-- what the hell, man? — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Wanted to watch the Chernobyl miniseries but thanks to Alexa I am deeply engrossed in "Cher: No Bull." What a life she's had! — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Canadian border agents say "No thanks, you diseased ingrate" in the most polite way. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Crammed a mattress into the Largo dressing room. I’ve never felt like a bigger star. https://t.co/tlKLFyDujm — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Genuinely jealous of people who live in haunted mansions right now and get to have company over. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Disney World is running a special where your ticket automatically gets you a Fast Pass to COVID. — PolitiTweet.org
