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Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Ricky Gervais asked me to tweet that his movie Cemetery Junction is playing at Mann Theatre in Glendale. I refuse. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Jersey Shore has added a new woman to the cast for their next season. No word yet on whether or not she likes to party. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
"Elena Kagan got onto the Supreme Court with no previous judicial experience." That’s what I just wrote on my Brain Surgeon job application. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Wyclef Jean has filed papers to run for President of Haiti. If his politics are as good as his rapping on "Hips Don't Lie", Haiti is saved. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Clash of the Titans on DVD features an alternate ending never seen in theaters. Also included is the original ending never seen in theaters. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
This next tweet was written by Matt Nedostup, the winner of our Team Coco Tweet Contest over at http://teamcoco.com. Congrats, Matt! — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Newsweek was just sold for $1. To show you how media has changed, the asking price for my twitter account is 65 billion dollars. Cash. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
BP’s ruptured oil well is almost plugged, and just as I was starting to enjoy the taste of petroleum-snapper. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I refuse to see Inception because I am worried it will confuse me. I had trouble following "Marley and Me." — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The President of the United States doesn't know who Snooki is. Our great empire continues to crumble. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I may or may not be one of the secret celebrity guests at Chelsea Clinton's wedding; It depends how tight security is. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Ellen has walked away from a television institution after one year, but I’m sure it’s the right decision. Now, back to my model rocketry. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The Kindle 3 was released yesterday. I read about it on my iPad. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Starting to make big strides on the TBS show. We’re finally getting close to picking a host. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Angelina Jolie is joining Twitter. If she thinks she can lure away my core audience of young male teens she.....I'm screwed. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
An LSU professor has invented a remarkable cheap & effective homemade device that soaks up oil. It's called "Conan's face in high school". — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Looking forward to watching Mad Men tonight. Christina Hendricks is the second sexiest redhead in Hollywood. Congrats, Ron Howard! — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
There's a guy at Comicon wearing a sci fi costume who has a stunted emotional life. Arrest on sight. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king.... But the three eyed man is still a g**damn freak. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Baskin-Robbins will be cutting 5 ice cream flavors at the end of July. Farewell, "Cadaver Chunk." — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
It's the hottest July on record in New York City, unless you count that summer I wore short shorts. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
UK PM in DC to talk BP with VP. Damn, I just lost my Twitter license. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Just read that Facebook has reached 500 million users. Congrats to everyone who helped create history's largest stalker/pedophile buffet. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
My wife just had the ultimate celeb sighting: my reflection in a bowl of soup. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Today I am in San Francisco, where I will be honored with the 2010 Tribute Award at Sketchfest. I am getting laid tonight! — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Rest assured, I'm hard at work on the new studio. http://twitpic.com/25uh1q — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The YMCA has officially shortened it's name to "The Y". You know times are tough when letters are even getting laid off. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The courts have slashed FCC policy, relaxing the ban on TV profanity. Coming this Fall to TBS: "Conan's G*d Damn F***ing Sh*t A**hole Hour". — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I found a huge design flaw in my new iPhone. People get angry when I talk on it during a funeral. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Major disappointment today: I discovered that all the episodes of "Fringe" that I DVRed are NOT about cool leather cowboy jackets. — PolitiTweet.org
