Conan O'Brien

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Katy Perry has a new 3-D concert movie coming out. Nope. No joke to make there. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

President @BarackObama claims to be a Trekkie. But where’s the proof? Why won’t he release his fan fiction? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

My mother used to hide the eggs in the same place every Easter... the dairy section of our local supermarket. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I refuse to play the Masters Tournament until Augusta National admits women. I encourage all other non-golfers to do the same. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Just saw a lame white guy lip-synching a Jay-Z song as I drove past the mirror store. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

They can see every man's bald spot and down every woman's blouse. THAT'S why giraffes are always smirking. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

There are over 2000 Applebee’s in this country, and I won’t rest until my photo hangs in every one. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Tonight On #Conan, @MikeTyson talks about [STANDARDS & PRACTICES EDIT] — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

"I'm very gooooooooaaaaaaaaaaall!!!!-oriented." (Mexican sportscaster at a job interview) — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

My new iPad is getting real hot. I’m confused… Are they not microwavable? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

.@mashable is out of touch. So as of this moment, I am taking over. ALL HAIL YOUR NEW CEO: http://t.co/NPsiLz4m #Conashable — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

The Smithsonian has a video game exhibit. There’s even a tour guide who yells at you for not being outside on such a nice day. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Like most party animals, I start my weekend by checking the three day forecast on http://t.co/yBhyZuPa. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Jesus, Abe Lincoln, Sofia Vergara, and Sofia Vergara again. #MyFinalFour — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

After his shocking statement, Ron Burgundy proves once again he is the master of the jazz flute. Check it out: http://t.co/ry3GGwBg — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Ron Burgundy makes an incredible announcement on my show tonight. http://t.co/ujtsebxY — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

What I see every day at rehearsal: http://t.co/MvkmgGfQ — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Bear Grylls' survival show got canceled last week. Something tells me he's going to make it through this just fine. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Got my oil changed downtown just so I could tweet something that sounded dirty. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

How embarrassing. My son opened a box labeled "Daddy's Things - Private" and found all my Styx cassettes. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I’m in Vegas with the boys! Wait, nope. Home alone playing roulette on my iPad. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Anyone else worried that we're in the midst of a cupcake store bubble? — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I dislike @JoelMcHale. Therefore, I will not tell you that @nbcCommunity is back and will not be strongly urging you to watch tonight @ 8. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

That moment when you realize you’ve put too much wasabi in your mouth? Only time I’m happy. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Tonight I host my show on a mini set. Why? Because I can. #miniCONAN http://t.co/FJOyekWL — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

I finally saw Drive. Man, it really captures that awkwardness of when the girl you’re courting watches you kill a henchman on an elevator. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Excited about my new Guinness Nikes. These are so much nicer than my Jose Cuervo Crocs. http://t.co/2FTJJg8P — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

At some point, I’m going to have to tell my kids they’re not adopted. They’ll be crushed. — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Hey guys, I’m starting a cool new hashtag: #tweetmeyoursocialsecuritynumber — PolitiTweet.org

Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

Any good will the Irish earn during the year, they squander it all on St. Patrick's Day. — PolitiTweet.org