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Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The countdown to #ConanCUBA begins. Here's a behind the scenes peek at my Cuban talk show desk. http://t.co/agosc74NgO — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
That unreleased book by Dr. Seuss they just discovered proves that Fifty Shades of Grey was completely plagiarized. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Hey @RickyGervais -- when I stare out my window without genitalia, you should respect my privacy. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Now that those new, untouched photos of Beyoncé have surfaced, the truth is out: I am the one they call Beyoncé. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Just gave my daughter “the talk”, where I explain that one day, Joe Biden might place his hands on her shoulders. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Man—tonight’s audience was rough. http://t.co/kDLPgoJcRY — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I'm not one to promote other comedy shows, but "Man Seeking Woman" (that airs Wednesdays at 10:30pm on FXX) is absolutely hilarious. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I don’t know why, but I’m a much better dancer when I’m in Cuba. http://t.co/2ytRWKuIe6 — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
2/2: experiences of my life. Many laughs, but that could also be the rum. Watch #ConanCUBA March 4th. http://t.co/Oa7YW5Pmsy — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
1/2: I just spent the last four days shooting my show all around the city of Havana. I made countless friends and had one of the best — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I put the “erectile fun” in “erectile dysfunction.” — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I may have just swallowed a candy heart with a stent. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Puerto Rico may fine parents up to $800 if their kids are obese. Well, Puerto Rico, I guess you're not interested in statehood. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Saw the “Fifty Shades of Grey” movie. It’s 90 minutes of some half-naked guy searching for a tiny handcuff key. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
#TheWalkingDead's @SteveYeun & I got naked at a Korean spa. You've been warned. http://t.co/bD6A5b8Dr6 #CONAN — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I think Master Chef Jr. might be fixed. They just showed a close-up of a kid's hand, and it had liver spots and a wedding band. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Kanye West just ran up, grabbed my “World’s Greatest Dad” mug, and gave it to a more deserving recipient. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
My accountant says I can no longer deduct my own tears as a “cost of business”. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The author of “50 Shades of Grey” has finished her next book. But she won’t release it unless you say the safe word. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I'm shocked. Back when Brian Williams and I killed Osama Bin Laden, he seemed like an honest guy. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Looking back on my life so far, I’m proud to say I’ve only committed speakable horrors. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Just found out my audition tape for “Magic Mike” was immediately sent over to “Tragic Mike.” — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
My trainer says he can get me in “Hemsworth brother after a bout with mono” shape. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I don’t know about you, but I always set my Doomsday Clock five minutes ahead. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
I can’t believe I didn’t win the Super Bowl office pool with the numbers I drew, ½ and Pi. — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The Big Question: Will @MoneyLynch or @RobGronkowski do my touchdown dance today? #SB49: http://t.co/el3zSlPn96 — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Hot wings, bean dip, 20 dudes in my living room – plans are all set for Valentine’s Day! — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Just ruminating on how different my life would be now if my childhood nickname had been “Gronk” instead of “There he is—Get him!” — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
The winner of #SB49 will be decided by @MoneyLynch & @RobGronkowski playing #MortalKombatX on #CONAN: https://t.co/3o8Ft5joLn — PolitiTweet.org
Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien
Sports Illustrated laid off all its photographers. Good luck finding someone willing to take pictures of hot swimsuits models for free. — PolitiTweet.org
